Darn it feels good to be a gangsta

Oct. 28, 2009

lil KLately, for some reason I have been hearing a lot of parenting stories, seeing lots of iphone photos and videos of people’s children, and to top it all off a Century 21 employee tried to sell me “Baby’s First Christmas” ornaments. I’m not really liking what this could be foreshadowing. But, God willing, I do know that at some point in my life all the advice and stories that I’m hearing may come in handy, so I listen and I watch and I learn.

So last night at the bar CM and I started chatting with this man, he seemed to be a pretty interesting dude, he shared his life story and then began talking about his kids. He is a widower and has three girls all under the age of 13. In my opinion, he has a different take on parenting. Here are a few things he shared about his parenting technique:

  • Enroll you children in self defense class early in life. Apparently his oldest is a black belt in some sort of self defense technique
  • Meet your child’s friend’s parents. It’s much easier to weed out the bratty kids if you find out who the bratty parents are. The technique: Invite all your kid’s friend’s parents over before the slumber party and tell them that if their kid acts up you will give them a beat down. Any parent who does not like this idea probably had a kid deserving of a beat down.
  • There is a fine line between fear and respect. Your children should respect you but not fear you. It seemed to me that this man used a little more of the fear tactic to earn his kids respect, but hey whatever works.

These three techniques seemed a little unconventional to me. However I am a fan of the second bullet, and possible the first – as long as my kids doesn’t find out that s/he can physically fight me and win.


October 29, 2009. Tags: . Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

One Week Anniversary

Oct. 27, 2009

Today is our one week apartment anniversary. Tonight we officially unpacked the last of our stuff, there is a tiny bit more organizing to do and then we will be done. So to celebrate we had a home date. We ate dinner at a real table, drank some good SB wine out of our real wine glasses and looked through our wedding proofs, trying to find the ones that were digital album worthy.

Mr.K and I still seem to be adjusting to Jersey City life, it’s different driving to Bed Bath and Beyond, and not being able to quickly run out to the store for lemons. I miss walking  – although having a car has been great, since it’s been raining for the past two days, I miss my walks home from Union Square. But each day is easier than the last. Now if I could find out which path car lets me out right in front of the stairs -that would be a huge victory. Right now I get stuck in the back of the pack smothered in a sea of people all trying to make their way up the same tiny staircase. But hey it could be worse, and each day out in the boonies is better than the last, so by mid November the days should be borderline great!

October 28, 2009. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

Home Depot

Oct. 26, 2009

Tonight I went to Home Depot to purchase a table top cut from plywood and a closet hanger bar. Here are a few highlights from my trip:

I rolled my flatbed cart to the back of the wood section where I hear the saw cutting wood, figuring some staff person would be back there to help me choose a piece of plywood.

Mrs. K: Hi, my table top broke and I’m looking to replace it.

Worker: Was it glass? We can’t cut glass here.

Mrs. K: No, I want to buy some plywood and have it cut down.

Worker: How big does it need to be? I have this piece of wood that you can have, it’s left over from a job we did, it’s a nice piece of wood.

Mrs.K: No, I think I need something wider than that maybe 40” x 40”? Do you have anything like that?

Worker: No, but you can go down that aisle and get some plywood and have it cut down to the size you want.

Mrs. K: Can you help me find one? Wait do you even work here?

Worker: No, I’m just a vendor

Mrs. K: Ha-ha sorry!

At the checkout:

HD Worker: You know you have to pay for the entire sheet of plywood; you should go get the rest of it.

Mrs. K: No, all I need is this piece

HD Worker: No, really you paid for the rest of the wood you should go get it.

Mrs. K: OK I will go pick it up

Me after I have retrieved the very large piece of leftover wood:

I try to push my flatbed cart down the aisle with the two large pieces of plywood stacked on top, my cart goes crooked and crashes into the saw cart, I straighten out my cart, begin to push it, and crash into the saw cart again, I straighten out my cart begin to push it and crash into the saw cart again, I straighten out my cart begin to push it and crash into the saw cart again, I straighten out my cart begin to push it and crash into the saw cart again, I straighten out my cart begin to push it and crash into the saw cart again, I straighten out my cart begin to push it and crash into the saw cart again. Finally I make it past the saw cart.


As I round the corner to exit the building I take out the metal display cart, creating quite a clatter, and numerous stares.

The Elevator:

Somehow I managed to park on the second floor of Home Depot, now I must get the cart into the elevator. I miss the elevator twice, but finally get it on the third try, but knock both pieces of plywood off the cart in the process.

The Car:

Finally I make it to the car, try to put the larger piece of wood into the back seat, it does not fit. I lean the wood against the flatbed cart, the wood pushes the cart and it rolls away. The HD worker cleaning the parking lot offers to help; he cannot get the larger piece of wood into the truck either. After 5 more minutes of rearranging, I tell him to take the wood back to the store. I put the table top piece of wood into the back seat.

I vow never to go to Home Depot alone again.

October 28, 2009. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.


Oct. 25, 2009

“I think I am procrastinating about changing my name because I’m scared that I will lose my sense of self once I take your name.” Mrs. KMrs. K

So despite the fact that in this blog I call myself Mrs.K, in real life I am still Mrs. R. I have not yet changed my name officially or unofficially. All through highschool and college I was HR or RA, up until now I never really thought much of it, I didn’t feel like I was attached to my last name. I never had a problem with taking my husbands last name, and I still don’t have a problem with it, I want to take Mr. K’s last name. But for some reason I can’t seem to do it.

Sunday morning Mr. K and I went for a run through colonial Williamsburg/more of the W&M campus, and grabbed sandwiches with Mr. and Mrs. W at  the Cheeseshop. After hearing how it had the best, most addictive sandwiches, we figured it was worth a try. It was worth the hype and the wait – the wheat bread was pretty phenomenal! We went to Richmond and met Mr. and Mrs. W’s family and hung out in their beautiful house until our flight.

Once on the plane I brought up my name change. I hadn’t realized it before, but part of me is scared that I will lose my sense of self once I take on the K last name. I know that this is silly, I know that I will not magically morph into a different person, once I go from R to K – I will be the same person I was a Mrs. R. But I am a little sad to see my name and nicknames disappear. HK is foreign to me – the first time one of my friends referred to me as HK it took me a few minutes to figure who they were talking about.

I also did not consider the fact that my comment would hurt Mr. K. I really did not mean for it to be hurtful it was just a series of thought going through my mind. The name change issue had been biting at me for a while, and I couldn’t figure out where my hesitation came from. Now that I have figured out where my fear and hesitation stems from, it’s easier to confront it.  I am going to change my name both officially and unofficially, once I figure out how to exactly start that process!

October 27, 2009. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.


Oct. 24, 2009

This weekend is homecoming at William and Mary College, Mr. K’s alma mater. I, an MU alum have never been to his campus before. Saturday morning we rolled out of bed, and tried to rehydrate at the homecoming football game. Mr. K gave me a quick tour of part of the campus, and we kissed on and walked over Crim Dell bridge. Apparently you will marry the person with whom you walk over the bridge, the only way to get out of marrying that person is to then push them off of the bridge, which I found out can be very dangerous to the person falling off the bridge. So hopefully Mr. K will not try and push me off the next time we return.

After re-living Mike D’s drunk driving story and walking past one of his old frat houses and dorms, we reached the tailgate area. I have never been to an official parking lot tailgate, I’ve tailgated other places but not in a parking lot. They had a really nice set up catered food, kegs, an SUV with a bar in the back, canopies for when it rained, and a nice grassy knoll where the kids could play. Yes, I said kids. The host of the tailgate hired college students to babysit their kids, one was rumored to have been a face painting clown. This is an ingenious idea, it’s the best of both worlds, you get to drink, hang out with your friends, and still be able to see that your kids have not been abducted by the college sitters. I am being opened up to a world of possibilities of entertaining and being entertained post kids. Something I had my doubts about two days ago.

I am hoping that this year will be the year when I learn about living and entertaining with kids. Right now I like to drink and entertain, but I don’t really like kids, because the way I see it, once I have some I won’t be able to do any of the above. But this gives me hope that
 a. my kids can be well-behaved
b. I will still be able to entertain with them – at least once they are old enough to entertain themselves.

October 27, 2009. Tags: . Uncategorized. Leave a comment.


Oct. 23, 2009

Baby on BoardAir Force One has shut down JFK airport. We literally got on the plane and 5 minutes later they announced that because Obama want to land, we cannot take off. So there we all sat for the next two hours. As we sat there trying to entertain ourselves I couldn’t help but notice that there were two babies on the plane. Their occasional screams and swine flu sounding cough made sure that I knew they were on board. But the screaming and crying was only occasional – these babies were very well behaved. Which got me wondering what these parents were doing to keep their babies so calm and quiet.

Mr. K and I travel a lot, we are flying/driving somewhere two to three weekend out of the month. Once we have kids we might not travel as often, but I still want to keep traveling. So how do we have the baby that is quiet, calm, and well mannered while traveling? Is it the luck of the genetic draw, similar to how some babies are blond and others are brunette, some babies scream on planes and some babies sleep. Or is there some sort of magic potion you can give them that will just knock them out for the next 6 hours? Or do babies just automatically fall asleep when they enter a moving object – kinda like myself. Now I know this last one can’t be true because we have all been on that flight where the baby will not stop screaming. So I guess when the time comes I will just have to chat it up with other marrieds who travel with their youngins to find out the secret of their success. Or I will have to pack my child up in a box and mail him to my parents whenever Mr. K and I plan on traveling.

October 26, 2009. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

Wedding Proofs – Almost Here

Oct. 22, 2009

weddingYay! today I get the proofs from our wedding! Can’t wait to see how they turned out. I wish we could take them to VA with us for the weekend. However I have a feeling there will be no time to look at them between unpacking and trip to Home Depot and Bed Bath and Beyond.

October 23, 2009. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

Moving In

Oct. 21, 2009

As we sat on our “new” couch sipping champagne out of the same glass (we could only find one champagne glass), between our half opened boxes Mr. K and I came to the shared realization that this kinda sucks. Mr. K’s commute time has practically tripled, and mine has grown by about 15 minutes, and taking the bus to the path is not at all convenient.

We then dropped the negative vibes and concentrated on how things will more than likely get better. We have been spoiled with our penthouse apartment with the 500 square foot terrace, just 10-20 minutes away from where we work, and a short walk from our favorite restaurants. So of course our attic apartment in the burbs of Jersey City, where we have to transfer during our lengthy commute seems unbearable at the moment. Eating microwave dinners in our shamble of an apartment forces the outlook to be grim. So it’s time to pack up the grim attitude and focus on all the good, and I feel like there is potential for there to be a whole lotta good here.

What I would like to get out of our four months in Jersey is a neat experience, which will hopefully lead to a slower paced homey life, without the huge distractions that the city offers. I have a few things that I would like to accomplish in these next four months and I’m hoping to find the motivation to do them, during the winter months when most everyone stays inside anyways.

October 23, 2009. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

Am I Boring???

Oct. 20, 2009

“All you do is eat and sit on a truck, eat and sit on a truck. I feel like I will get bored, which is why it might be cool to plan our trip when Mr. S and Mrs. G are going.” – Mr. K

I immediately took this to mean that Mr. K thinks I’m boring, and that he would be bored out of his mind if he had to go on our Africa trip with just me. To me my thought made perfect sense, 99% of all the vacations we take are with members of his family – so there are more people on the trip than just me. In the 4.75 years that we have been dating we have taking two trips just the two of us, one of those was our mini moon in Montreal, the other one Alaska. So for him to want to invite his friends on our honeymoon, reinforced my thoughts of Mr. K thinking I’m a boring vacation partner.

I asked Mr. K where all this came from, because about 5 days ago he was totally into this Africa trip – I felt like all these hesitations came out of nowhere.  How can someone drastically change their mind like that?  It completely blind sighted me. It has been happening a lot lately. He will be completely on board with an idea one day and then a week later have done a complete 180 and changed his mind. What if one day he just wakes up and changes his mind about me? Sorry Mrs. K I don’t love you anymore see ya around. There I would be having no clue as to what just happened or why it happened. That is what scares me most about Mr. K’s recent changes of opinion. I love that we are able to express our doubts, likes and concerns about the events occurring in our relationship – I think it’s truly amazing that we are able to freely share our thoughts and feelings with each other. But as of late it is also turned into a scary thing since I never can be 100% sure what he is going to say, or where those words originated. So we talk it out, and find the outcome that we both feel secure about. It’s important that we are both heard, that neither of us harbor pent up feelings of resentment – that somewhere down the line could lead us to change our minds about each other.

The truth is I think it would be very cool to do part of our Africa trip with Mr. S and Mrs. G – they are really fun and interesting people. Every time I have hung out with them I have had a great time! They both are super adventurous and Mr. S works with animals tagging sea turtle and polar bears so he is familiar with the wild animal scene. Having people on the trip with the same adventurous spirit as we do would be awesome! But this is our honeymoon, I want be able to see everything that I want to see and not run around on someone else’s schedule, cheating me out of the experience that I want to create for myself, and for us. Plus I do want part of it to be romantic and lovey and lavish. I’m not saying we need to spend $50k on this vacation, but I do want the room with the view of the ocean on the beach for at least one night. But what I really want is for us to have some time alone, not drinking beers with friends, not hanging out with family, ALONE, without distractions from our life in America.

October 21, 2009. Uncategorized. Leave a comment.

Check and Check

Oct. 19, 2009

A few years ago Mr. K told me that it was his dream to someday move out west, at the time I was not the biggest fan of this dream. I wanted to stay in NYC – I didn’t feel like I had truly experienced all this city has to offer. So it was then and there that I made a list of things I wanted to do before I leave New York.

So many people fantasize about living in this city, and there I was taking it for granted, barely taking advantage of anything it has to offer. I did not want to leave the city with the regret that I never fully lived in the city.

Last night I checked two more bullet points off of my list:

  • Eat at a Food Network chef restaurant
  • Eat at a dessert bar

Yum in the tum!To celebrate the fact that we were able to sell the apartment we went out to dinner at Casa Mono, Mario Batalli’s restaurant. Now I’m having a little internal conflict, because I’m not sure if Mario is still on the Food Network, so I’m not sure if I can officially check this item off my list. Anyways, I was excited to finally spend a little quality alone time with Mr. K, and some yummy food. We talked about how our life together doesn’t seem to be slowing down, our schedule is always full of some obligation or adventure. We chatted about the future and when we thought we were going to have some down time, the conclusion we reached was never. But in amidst all this the “us” talk, we also talked about the food:

  • Razor clams: I have seen these on every cooking show lately, and now I know why – they were scrumptious, not overly chewy and full of flavor, although on some bites that flavor was a little heavy on the garlic
  • Pork croquettes and fried green tomatoes: the croquettes had a good crunch, but it was hard to get the pork flavor when eaten with the tomatoes, sauce and other garnishes
  • Duck egg: this was the highlight of the meal. Yummy, yummy, yummy. Mr. K’s and my fav of the night.
  • Shrimp w/squid ink rice: the best shrimp I have ever eaten! – although way small for more than one person. The rice was tasty, the squid ink gave it a nice seafood flavor.
  • Chorizo and Bean stew: this dish was a flavor party, and had a more “hearty” feel to it. I preferred the darker sausage to the redder sausage.

After dinner we made a brief pit stop at Barnes and Noble to check out some books on Africa then we decided to check another item offBest Cheesecake Ever! my list and headed to ChikaLicious, a dessert bar. We sat at the bar and watched the chefs create all the tiny mouth watering desserts. They have a pre-fixe menu where you get an amuse bouche, dessert, and petit fours. Here is what we sampled:

  • Dulche de leche panna cotta with lemon sorbet: the lemon sorbet was spot on – the best I’ve ever had, and the panna cotta was super creamy and sweet. Both of them together did a dance in my mouth. This is my second fav of the night.
  • Cheesecake: this cheesecake was very light and airy, and didn’t have that distinct cheesecake taste. It was the perfect density and sooo creamy
  • Almond cream puff with concord grape sorbet: this dish was the most interesting; it has some sort of seaweed jelly which was cool to look at but didn’t really taste like much. The concord sorbet was the highlight of this dish. The first grape flavor that I have had that does not taste like dimatab.
  • Steamed Fig Pudding Cake: My favorite of the night. This cake was so moist and delicious and I enjoyed the crunch of the seeds. Sooooo good! Mr. K’s fav too.
  • Petit fours: coconut marshmallow: that I want for my pillow, truffles: I loved the crunch as you bite into it, and shortbread cookie.

We went out with a bang – such a fabulous way to spend our last night in the city together. Now it’s off on our next adventure in Jersey City, where about 20 boxes are waiting for us to unpack them.

October 20, 2009. Tags: , . Uncategorized. 1 comment.

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